Draco & Hermione -- Darkwriter Kay
by Dark Writers
Summary: Hehe... This is Kay's version of Romeo & Juliet.... Please read, it WILL be really funny!!!!
1. Cast

Draco & Hermione **__**

Draco & Hermione

Darkwriter Kay's parody of William Shakespeare's Romeo & Juliet

Author's Notes: Um, well, yeah. That title thingy is pretty self-explanatory. I would like to add that I don't own anything in this story except my muse and me. Please review and tell me what you think of the cast of this fanfic!

~ Kay, empress of evil rubber ducks

PS, I won't make Draco a pathetic loser, I promise! Also, please note: these castings are subject to change. Plus, maybe casting changes in the middle of an act will be quite hilarious! And if I spelled someone's name wrong, please correct me!

__

Cast:

Malfoy's (Montagues):

  1. Lucius Malfoy (Lord Montague) – Some rich evil dude
  2. Lady Malfoy (Lady Montague) – The rich evil dude's wife
  3. Draco (Romeo) – The son of the Malfoy's
  4. Ron's Evil Twin (Benvolio) – Ron's evil twin; cousin to Draco (makes sense!)
  5. Pansy (Balthasar) – A bystander, just 'cuz I didn't know where else to put her
  6. Crabe & Goyle (Abram) – a couple of guys that play one part… "servants" of Draco

Granger's (Capulets):

  1. Mr. Granger (Lord Capulet) – Hermione's father, doesn't have anything to do with this story
  2. Mrs. Granger (Lady Capulet) – Hermione's mother, also doesn't have anything to do with this story
  3. Hermione (Juliet) – The daughter of the Granger's
  4. Fred (Tybalt) – Hermione's cousin, but not really
  5. Ginny (Nurse) – Hangs around Hermione
  6. Neville (Sampson) – R & J rebel
  7. Seamus, Dean, and Colin(Gregory) – more R & J rebels who all happen to play the same part

Prince's:

  1. Snape (Prince Escalus) – Well, its Snape… And it seemed like a good idea… I guess we'll see, though!
  2. Harry (Count Paris) – Well, yeah, he's there. This _is_ a Harry Potter fanfic, so Harry has to be here somewhere!
  3. George (Mercutio) – Well, he hangs around Ron's Evil Twin and Draco… Poor George…
  4. Ron (Page) – Harry's ser—uh—friend. Gives advice and such. Probably a useless part, just like Pansy, Crabe & Goyle, Neville, and Seamus, Dean, & Colin. :: shrugs:: Oh, well… ^^ I'll find something for them to do.

Others:

  1. Lee Jordan and Professor McGonagall as the Chorus – This is going to be interesting… ^^
  2. Dumbledore (Friar Laurence) – a good guy who only wants peace between the Malfoy's and the Granger's, and who knows the slim odds of that ever happening
  3. Snape (Apothecary) – Potions teacher… Poison… Um, it fits, doesn't it?
  4. Dumbledore (Friar John) - ::snicker, snort:: I'm having too much fun already! Joy! ::snicker, snort::
  5. Neville (Curtain) – Well, we needed one!
  6. Others (Others) – Um, that's anyone like Lockhart who I couldn't put anywhere else…

Narrator:

  1. Kay (me, the author!) – Yeah, I'm in here somewhere. Don't worry, if yah lose me, it's all for the better, I suppose…
  2. Horse (Kay's muse) – An evil muse at that… Don't think it likes my writing.

Setting:

Hogwarts, and various other places I haven't thought of yet

Some more Author's Notes: ::laughs:: Okay, okay. You all probably know by now that I'm going to have _toooooooo_ much fun with this… Just be ready for some surprises and stuff, and a lot of funny things!!

Romeo & Juliet wasn't that bad. It's just that it drove me nuts. Well, Mr. Shakespeare and all you English teachers out there, It's my payback time!

Oh, and, PLEASE DON'T FLAME ME!!!!!! Just review and I'll be happy.


	2. Prologue and ActI, scene1

Harry Potter and characters which belong to those books belong to JK Rowling. _Romeo and Juliet_ and the text in which it contains belongs to Mr. Shakespeare. Kay and Horse belong to… well… Kay.

**_Draco_****_ & Hermione_**

Darkwriter Kay's parody of William Shakespeare's Romeo & Juliet

Prologue

_When scene opens, we see Neville sitting on the far right side of the stage. He stands._

_Enter LEE JORDON_

_Exit NEVILLE_
    
    LEE JORDON: _smiles at audience, then start to search his pockets; pulls out a piece of paper and starts to read off it "Two households, both alike in dignity,_

In fair Verona, where we lay our scene,

From ancient grudge break to new mutiny,

Where civil blood makes civil hands unclean.

From forth the fatal loins of these two foes

A pair of star-cross'd lovers take their life;

Whose misadventur'd piteous overthrows

Doth with their death bury their parents' strife.

The fearful passage of their death-mark'd love,

And the continuance of their parents' rage,

Which but their children's end naught could remove,

Is now the two hours' traffic of our stage;

The which, if you with patient ears attend,

What here shall miss, our toil shall strive to mend."

_After he finishes, he walks over to where NEVILLE was standing and sits._

SCENE: A Hogwarts corridor

_Enter NEVILLE__ and SEAMUS, DEAN, & COLIN_

SEAMUS: What a way to start of a story…

NEVILLE: How?

SEAMUS: By telling the ending, of course!

NEVILLE: Are they supposed to do that?

COLIN: Is that what Lee said?

DEAN: Did you not understand what he said?

NEVILLE, SEAMUS, COLIN: No…

DEAN: Me neither. Anyway, how'd we get stuck playing these parts?

SEAMUS: I dunno.

NEVILLE: Has any of you seen Harry or Ron?

SEAMUS, DEAN, COLIN: No…

_Enter PANSY, CRABBE & GOYLE_

NEVILLE: _Hides behind SEAMUS and DEAN_

SEAMUS: _Quietly Slytherins!_

PANSY: Gryffindors! What are you doing here?!

DEAN: Can't you see? We're just walking!

PANSY: What should I believe a **Gryffindor**? **Impedimenta**!

SEAMUS: **Furnunculus**!

_Both spells cancel each other._

RON'S EVIL TWIN: What's going on here? A fight?! Cool! Wait, hold on… _pulls the script out of no where and reads the scene again Okay… **Expelliarmus**! __PANSY's__ and SEAMUS's wands fly towards RET, and he catches them_

PANSY and SEAMUS: What'd you do that for?

RET: The script says I have to _PANSY and SEAMUS read the script; they nod in acknowledgement_

_Enter FRED_

FRED: _From behind COLIN  Now, that's not fair! **Expelliarmus**!_

_Enter SNAPE_

SNAPE: WHAT is the meaning of this? 20 points from Gryffindor!

_Enter DRACO, __who stays in the background_

SNAPE: And if any of you **Gryffindors** attack **any Slytherins** again, you'll be expelled. Now, get back to your common rooms, all of you.

_ALL leave, except RET, who goes over towards DRACO_

RET: What's up, Draco?

DRACO: _glares_

RET: Oh, you're still – C'mon, Draco, you need to get past that. She's never even talked to you. C'mon Draco!

DRACO: _glares, but less dangerously_

RET: Listen, I know someone who you'd be much happier with.

DRACO: _glares some more, but followes RET off stage._

**END**__


End file.
